By Riley & Grey  |  Wedding Planning  |  October 05, 2023

Dear Bride

Dear Bride, when it comes to wedding planning and being part of a newly engaged couple, sometimes you may find that expectations are not aligned with your reality.

The journey to your special day can be a rollercoaster of emotions. You're not alone in feeling the pressure to make everything perfect, to meet the expectations of family and friends, and to create a day that reflects your love story. It's perfectly normal to feel a mix of excitement and anxiety, and it's important to recognize that these bittersweet feelings are part of the process.

If you’re looking for some balance between wedding planning and enjoying this fleeting time as fiancées, here are some mindset shifts you can acknowledge or consider.

Black woman sitting in white dress
Image by Andy Johnson

Know Your Priorities

When it comes to all of the elements that go into a wedding, what do you really care about? Is it the food, music, or making sure you have time with your guests or each other? Each of you can write a “top three” list that is easy to reference back to as you’re making decisions.

Prioritize Your Priorities

Easier said than done, but if it’s not a top priority, it’s not worth spending an extensive amount of time or brain power on. Focus on what’s most important to you and that will help your wedding weekend to be a true reflection of you as a couple.

Keep Space For Flexibility

This is where we have to tell you to be realistic and that not everything is in your control. Hold onto your standards and put the time and effort into your priorities, but keep an open mind that everything may not go exactly as planned and still turn out incredible.

Accept Support

There is no prize at the end of your wedding for doing everything yourself. If you have family and/or friends that have offered to help, go through your to-do list and pick some tasks that they can take on or do with you. RSVP-chasing, seating assignments, bridal emergency-kit creation, or registry research are all low-risk to-do’s that can help you out.

Advocate For Yourselves

By having your priorities in check, and a clear picture of what you envision during this magical time, you will be better equipped to set boundaries or say no when needed. Lean on each other for support in expressing yourselves and know that you can be tactful and respectful while holding to those boundaries.

Celebrate Along The Way

Whether it’s taking time or doing a ritual to acknowledge milestones in wedding planning, or putting planning out of your mind for a bit to spend special time together, this brief period in the greater scheme of your lives together is fleeting and worth cherishing.

Remember Six Magic Words

In a recent episode of ‘The Mel Robbins Podcast,’ she shared a mantra that helps stop worrying and anxiety in its tracks, and is particularly applicable when it comes to your big day that hasn’t happened yet. “What if it all works out?” Asking yourself this question interrupts the endless loop of worries that run through your head and takes you out of assuming the worst before it has happened. “What if it all works out?” gives you the power to visualize a positive outcome and focus on how to get there.

So, dear bride, take a deep breath, know that someone may let you down, your budget may provide limitations, everyone may annoy you at the same time, and you may stray from a priority momentarily. Your stress and worries are valid. It's all part of the process, and in the end, it's going to be more than okay – it's going to be absolutely amazing.

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